The hype
Guests love the 'wow' factor of the design and the Thai food, but hate the noise and lack of maintenance.
Crazy Bear Beaconsfield
$150-450/ night
Book this if You want a hedonistic, Instagram-ready party weekend where the decor is louder than the music.
Why People Love It
- Unapologetically flamboyant decor (velvet walls, ceiling mirrors)
- Famous copper baths that fill from the ceiling
- High-energy pool terrace with a 'Made in Chelsea' vibe
Quick Take: A glitzy, aging diva of a hotel that trades sleep quality for champagne sales and selfie backdrops.
Reviewed by @KateSamuilova9247250: I spent my 35th birthday here and it was unforgettable. Watching the bath fill from the ceiling while surrounded by red velvet was the most indulgent experience of my life. It felt like a total fantasy world.
Guest Who Stayed Here Said
Reality check
The 'Snug' rooms are claustrophobically small, and the 'Decadent' rooms often show signs of wear like peeling wallpaper and cracked mirrors.
- You are an influencer or reality TV fan
- You prioritize a party atmosphere over a quiet night's sleep
- You want a bathtub that fills from the ceiling
Cleanliness & Maintenance
5.5
- Housekeeping: Inconsistent. Many reports of missed dust, especially on velvet surfaces and heavy drapes.
- Bathroom hygiene: Frequent complaints about 'grubby' grout, hair left behind, and flooding wet rooms.
- Maintenance: Aging poorly. Peeling wallpaper, cracked mirrors, and broken lights are common complaints.
- Linens & towels: Generally decent, though some reports of stained pillows.
- Odors & scents: Some rooms have a musty/damp smell, often masked by heavy cleaning products.
Sleepability™
4MODERATE
0-4LOUD
4-7.5MODERATE
7.5-10SILENT
- DJ/music from the bar until 1am
- Loud guests in corridors
- Pool terrace noise
Before you book
Good to know
- Breakfast is NOT included and costs ~£14-25 per person
- The hotel is cashless (card only)
- Dinner reservations are essential for the Thai and English restaurants
What to pack
- Earplugs (essential for sleep)
- Swimwear (for the pool/terrace photo op)
- Dressy outfits (the crowd dresses to impress)
Room Genie
Best picks
- Decadent Room (for the signature copper bath experience)
- Boujee Room (slightly larger, velvet-heavy decor)
Rooms to avoid
- Snug Room (tiny, often described as a cupboard)
- Room 13 (specific maintenance complaints cited in reviews)
Room Request Genie – copy & paste
“I am requesting a room on the top floor, as far away from the bar and pool terrace as possible, to minimize noise disturbance.”
FAQ & Hidden tips
Everything you actually want to know before you book.
Is the pool heated?
No, it is generally unheated and acts as a 'cold plunge' in winter, though it's a popular hangout spot for drinks.
Is breakfast included?
No, breakfast is a la carte and costs extra (approx. £14 for a main dish).
Can I bring my dog?
No, the hotel has a strict no-pets policy.
Is there parking?
Yes, free parking is available on-site, but it can fill up during events.
What is the crowd like?
Flashy, young-ish, and moneyed. Think reality TV stars and those who want to live like them.
Is it suitable for children?
No, the hotel is strictly 18+ adults only.
Insider Tips
- ✨
The 'Snug' rooms are often cheaper for a reason—they are incredibly small with barely room to walk around the bed.
- ✨
Visit the bar between 5pm-7pm for occasional happy hour deals (check current offers).
- ✨
The Thai restaurant is widely considered better than the English restaurant.
5 things to know before you go
💡The 'wet room' bathrooms often flood the entire floor.
💡Lighting in the rooms is mood-dependent (very dark), making it hard to do makeup.
💡There is a £150 security deposit hold on your card upon arrival.
💡Some 'luxury' touches like the velvet walls are dust magnets and can trigger allergies.
💡The pool area is more for posing with cocktails than actual swimming.
Local Playbook
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