The hype
Reviewers are obsessed with the 'vibe' and the staff's WhatsApp service, but often shocked by how small and dark the rooms actually are.
House Of Gods Royal Mile
$150-350/ night
Book this if You want a hedonistic, Instagram-ready lair in the heart of Old Town where the cocktails matter more than the square footage.
Why People Love It
- Unapologetically maximalist 'Gucci-clad' decor that feels like a rockstar's dressing room
- The 'Treat Me Like I'm Famous' rider with in-room cocktails, balloons, and midnight milk & cookies
- Prime Cowgate location steps from the Grassmarket and Royal Mile nightlife
Quick Take: It’s less of a hotel and more of a sexy, windowless nightclub bedroom where you sleep off the hangover.
Reviewed by @Valerija_jem: I felt like a total rockstar staying here. The vibe is incredibly moody and sexy—perfect for a romantic escape. Ordering the pizza and prosecco package straight to bed was the highlight of my trip. Honestly, I didn't want to leave the room!
Guest Who Stayed Here Said
Reality check
The 'Cabin' rooms are tiny (10 sqm) and feel like sleeping in a luxurious cupboard—cool for a night, cramping for a week.
- You're a couple looking for a romantic, moody escape
- You love maximalist design (velvet, gold, animal print)
- You plan to spend more time drinking cocktails than looking out a window
Cleanliness & Maintenance
8.5
- Housekeeping: Generally praised as spotless, though the heavy velvet decor attracts dust.
- Bathroom hygiene: Bathrooms are tiled (often marble effect) and usually reported as pristine.
- Maintenance: Everything is relatively new (opened 2019), but the 'vintage' aesthetic can mask wear.
- Linens & towels: High quality, plush, and fitting the luxury price point.
- Odors & scents: Often smells of the hotel's signature incense or room spray—love it or hate it.
Sleepability™
7MODERATE
0-4LOUD
4-7.5MODERATE
7.5-10SILENT
- Street noise from Cowgate bars/clubs
- Hallway noise due to the boutique layout
Before you book
Good to know
- There is no restaurant, but they deliver pizza and snacks to the room.
- Communication is primarily via WhatsApp—staff are super responsive.
- The 'Treat Me Like I'm Famous' package is an add-on (~£99) that includes the riders, balloons, and cocktails you see on Instagram.
What to pack
- Earplugs (just in case it's a rowdy Friday night)
- Light luggage (remember the stairs)
- Your best 'out out' outfit for the cocktail bar
Room Genie
Best picks
- The Suite: The only room with a freestanding Victorian bathtub and enough space to swing a cat (27 sqm).
- The Classic: A solid middle ground with a four-poster bed and hidden TV, but still compact (14 sqm).
Rooms to avoid
- The Cabin: Unless you are solo or extremely comfortable with your partner, 10 sqm is tight.
Room Request Genie – copy & paste
“We are celebrating a special occasion and would love a room on a higher floor to minimize street noise. If available, a room with the most effective soundproofing would be appreciated.”
FAQ & Hidden tips
Everything you actually want to know before you book.
Is there parking?
No. The hotel recommends NCP Edinburgh St Johns Hill or Castle Terrace, which cost around £28 per 24 hours.
Do the rooms have windows?
Mostly no. They use backlit 'fake' windows to create an Orient Express vibe. It's very dark.
Is breakfast included?
It depends on your rate, but it's always served as a hamper delivered to your room (bagels, yoghurt, juice, coffee).
Is there a gym?
No. This hotel is for hedonism, not health.
Can I bring my dog?
No, House of Gods is strictly no pets allowed.
Is there an elevator?
No. The hotel is in a historic building with steep stairs and no lift.
Insider Tips
- ✨
There is a 'Butler Button' in the room—press it for Prosecco or milk & cookies (charges may apply depending on your package).
- ✨
The TV is hidden behind the mirror; you have to turn it on to see it.
- ✨
The Nespresso machine is often hidden behind a secret panel or mirror—ask for the tour at check-in so you don't miss it.
5 things to know before you go
💡The rooms can get warm and stuffy due to the lack of opening windows.
💡The lighting is permanently 'moody'—doing makeup can be a challenge without a ring light.
💡You might find crumbs in the bed if the previous guest enjoyed the midnight cookies too much (rare, but mentioned).
💡The 'Visitor Levy' (tourist tax) will start applying to stays from July 2026, so book before Oct 2025 to avoid it for future trips.
💡The entrance is through the bar, which can be disorienting if you arrive with bags during a busy evening.
Local Playbook
Map
See where House Of Gods Royal Mile is located and what's nearby.